"He's a great guy. I've had him since he was a baby and now he's 5ft 10in. He's spoiled rotten - he has his own enclosure and a female pot-bellied pig in there who is his lover. Kangaroos will hump anything. I think the pig likes it. There's also a goat in the who he grew up with but they're just friends" - Vanilla Ice on his pet kangaroo. That's his pet kangaroo.
Story Of The Day
'Andreas Muller, 39, has gone to extreme lengths to win himself a car - having the word 'Mini' tattooed on to his penis. The crazy German decided to have the rather painful tattoo after a radio station ran a competition to win a £20,000 Mini Cooper. The brief: whoever pulled the craziest stunt to get the car would win. Unsurprisingly, Muller's offer to have the car manufacturer's name branded on to his penis topped the list of crazy suggestions. 'There were a lot of crazy stunts put forward by listeners, but Andreas won by a short head,' said one of the competition's organisers. Radio listeners were then treated to Muller's cries of agony while the unique piece of branding was created. Muller claims the pain was worth it, saying: 'Once I'm sitting in the car, it won't matter anymore. Then the pain will be gone and it'll be alright.' It has not been reported whether or not Mr Muller has a girlfriend' - Metro.
That story is just legendary. Imagine ladies, you're about to give this guy you've just met some lovin' and BAM! IT SAYS MINI!
Welcome to the Internet, where the men are men, the women are men, the children are police officers, everyone is correct all of the time, even when they're wrong, and where opinions are more valid the more insults and swear words you include with them.
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